OMG THE SPONGE-WORTHY EPISODE IS ON.
(Source: adagietto)
The Village Voice calls it a masterpiece. A young woman’s strange, erotic journey from Milan to Minsk. It’s a story about life. And love. And becoming a woman. ”Rochelle Rochelle” (The Movies)
PITT: It’s good, but…
ELAINE: But what??
PITT: Ultimately I don’t think they’ll stay up.
ELAINE (pulling up Pitt’s socks): No, no! They’ll stay up!
PITT: For a while, yes, but not in the long run.
ELAINE: But that’s why I got you the tighter ones! (Holds them up.)
PITT: Oh, forget about those! (Takes the socks from Elaine and throws them on the floor.) Why do you keep mentioning those?
ELAINE: What do you want!?
PITT: I want a decent sock that’s comfortable, that will stay on my foot!!(via The Chaperone)
The old sock man has passed away. One of my favorite Seinfeld bits. RIP, Pitt.
ELAINE: uh..excuse me…umm.. I’m sorry…this is.. this is kind of embarrassing but.. there’s no toilet paper over here
JANE (from the stall on Elaine’s right) are you talking to me?
ELAINE yeah..I just forgot to check so if you could just spare me some
JANE no I’m sorry
ELAINE what?
JANE no I’m sorry, I can’t spare it
ELAINE you can’t spare it??
JANE no there’s not enough to spare
ELAINE well I don’t need much, just 3 squares will do it
JANE I’m sorry I don’t have a square to spare, now if you don’t mind
ELAINE 3 squares? you can’t spare 3 squares??
JANE no I don’t have a square to spare, I can’t spare a square
ELAINE oh is it two-ply? cause it it’s two-ply I’ll take one ply, one ply, one, one
puny little ply, I’ll take one measly ply
JANE look, I don’t have a square and I don’t have a ply (flushing and leaving)
(Source: alpha-lima-lima-papa)
I don’t know when I’m going to get another chance to use this gif:
GEORGE: Hey. How come I didn’t get a Christmas card? Eeeverybody else got one. Jerry got one, Kramer got one. I thought we were good friends. I don’t get a Christmas card. I don’t get it.
ELAINE: You want a Christmas card? You want a Christmas card? All right here. Here’s your Christmas card.(via amyyy)
Reblogged last year, reblogging again this year. George’s face in the last frame is one of my life’s most favorite things.
ELAINE: So what do you want me to do?
GEORGE: Talk to him!
ELAINE: How can I do that?
GEORGE: You said the guy gave you an open-lipped kiss!
ELAINE (enunciating clearly so George gets the point): Yes, but then he wiped his hand on the top of the bottle when I offered him water!
GEORGE: Well, that doesn’t mean anything!
ELAINE: Are you kidding? That’s very significant! If he was interested in me, he’d want my germs! He’d just crave my germs!
JERRY (patiently): She’s right, George. Bottle-wipe is big.
GEORGE: Well, what about the open-lipped kiss?
JERRY: Bottle-wipe supercedes it.
GEORGE: Yeah, you’re right, you’re right. <To Elaine> Alright, maybe he’s not interested, but you still know him - can’t you just ask him?
ELAINE: George…but if I ask him now, I will have no chance of going out with him.
GEORGE: Why?
ELAINE: I…I don’t know…
GEORGE: Aha. Aha. Could it be because you don’t want him to know that you have a friend who pees in the shower, is that it?!
ELAINE: No, that’s not it!
GEORGE: Oh, I think it is! I think that’s exactly what it is!
ELAINE: Why couldn’t you just wait?
GEORGE: I was there! I saw a drain!
ELAINE: Since when is a drain a toilet?!
GEORGE: It’s all pipes! What’s the difference?!
ELAINE: Different pipes go to different places! You’re gonna mix ‘em up!
GEORGE: I’ll call a plumber right now! <Goes for the phone.>
JERRY: Alright, can we just drop all the pee-pipe stuff here?(via The Wife)
“It’s all pipes!”
SOUP NAZI: Next!
ELAINE: Hello.
SOUP NAZI: You. You think you can get soup? Please. You’re wasting everyone’s time.
ELAINE: I don’t want soup. I can make my own soup. ” 5 cups chopped Porcine mushrooms, half a cup of olive oil, 3 pounds celery.”
SOUP NAZI: That is my recipe for wild mushroom.
ELAINE: Yeah, that’s right. I got ‘em all. Cold cucumber, corn and crab
chowder, mulligatawny.
SOUP NAZI: Mulliga…tawny?
ELAINE: You’re through Soup Nazi. Pack it up. No more soup for you. NEXT!!!!(via The Soup Nazi)
